That's just mean....

Continuing on the topic of bullying.......


As most of you know both girls are in school now. The school has an "anti bullying" program. After watching a few vblogs about military wives bullying other military wives on various facebook sites, I decided to get some perspective. Our question and answer series.


Me: Girls, what is a bully?
Girl 1: someone that wants something that you have.
Girl 2: Yeah they punch you and yell at you until you give it to them.
Me: oh are they awful people?
Girl 1: yes, if they don't learn that if they ask we will share with them.
Girl 2: no, they just need a hug and someone to love them.


Me: Girl 1, do you remember when you lost your tooth and I wanted to send a picture to auntie and grammy so we could laugh.....
Girl 1: yeah.
Girl 2: she still doesn't have those teeth.
Me: Since you looked silly and we laughed at you, does that make me and Grammy and Auntie bullies?
Girl 1: no.
Girl 2: it might make you mean, but not a bully.


Me: If I think your clothes are silly or that they don't fit, and I laugh at you when I see you in silly clothes does that make me a bully?
Girl 1: no, but you have no fashion sense.
Girl 2: Well I always dress nice, so people won't laugh at me.
(they wear uniforms to school.)


Me: If I was your friend and you think that everything I tell you is mean, would you still be my friend?
Girl 1: No, unless you apologized to me. But if you were mean again, I would not be your friend.
Girl 2: No, I would tell you that you were mean and I would not talk to you anymore. I don't like mean people.


Me: What do you do if you see or hear something you don't like?
Girl 1: Walk away. Sometimes the bigger kids say mean things, so my friends and I stay away from them...then we don't have to hear what they think.
Girl 2 did not respond to this question.


I gave them a situation...Girl 1 likes chocolate ice cream, Girl 2 likes strawberry.
Me: Since you like chocolate and she likes strawberry does that make you better or her better?
Girl 1: I'm not better, just different.
Girl 2: Why would it make her better?
Me: I didn't say she was better I said, because she likes chocolate and you like strawberry is she better?
Girl 2: No. That's like saying the Boy is better because he likes vanilla...that is silly.


For the record my girls are 7 and 5. They are in Kindergarten and 1st grade. If they can grasp the concept of removing themselves from situations that they do not agree with, why can't adults get it?
If you see something that offends you, don't look. If you don't like what I have to say or how I say it, don't associate with me.
**these were not prompted, nor were they made up. They may not be verbatim but they are pretty close. We were in the car when this conversation took place.**